Friday, February 5, 2010

AGS - why does it attract the forum no-hoper types?

AGS attracts the bottom of the barrel forum cellar dwellers for the simplest of reasons.

It's free.

The price is right for the human zeroes. Were the program sold as opposed to given away a couple of things would have happened long ago:

1. the celllar dwellers would be largely absent, because if they weren't they'd be adversely affecting the goods and services the consumers had bought. That tends to have a definite knock on effect of a specific sort.

2. the paying customers would have savagely suppressed the nitwits' bullshit on the forums.

Unfortunately, we have the nerd love in exchange for programming syndrome at the top of AGS and that leads with the inevitability of a law of nature with the least good - the sort of antithesis of the socratic best and wisest- coming to run the asylum in the forums.

Which is why the forums rejoice in such activities as:

pixel critiquing by people who by their own admission don't know how to sprite, or indeed as far as we can tell draw using pen and paper;

programming advice from people who have never shown the slightest evidence that they know how to code... well, anything;

unwavering support for a screen resolution that even recent mobile games don't use;

a complete inability to adapt to a changing environment;

an inability to ever finish anything. one can imagine how the fields of study the slightly more intelligent of the forum no-hopers must go. one can only pray none of them will ever be in a position of responsibility. seems very unlikely to me that they're going to ever really "be" anything in 99% of cases.

then you look round and see the supreme and wonderful achievements of indie game makers using AGS, and the programme itself is unsullied by the sponsored rudeness and childishness of its forums. Almost...

A somewhat similar thing has happened with a couple of more or less open source MMO projects, one of them text based the other the now-traditional out of the box 3d kewl fighting type. In both projects there was this same struggle, and in both of those games there was the same unfortunate siding by the author with the wankers against the normals and indeed super-normals. End result in both cases was the extinction of the original game platform unfortunately.

I doubt that will happen to AGS because the author would no doubt continue to write new versions of it even if it really was just for the usual suspects rather than a broader user community. What I can definitely see happening in the near future though is a migration of the indies away from the amateur forums, which is what they definitely have become, in favour of posting and discussing somewhere else. It's on the cards, and some of us think it's long overdue. So who knows what will emerge.

I know one thing- the best minds and most entertaining posters stay the FUCK away from the AGS forums. Time for me to do the same. I'll just mail the self-appointed forum gods some of my favourite T-shirts... Most appropriate one for them would have to be, "I bring NOTHING to the table". So true. So horribly horribly true in their cases...

Oh look peanuts catch fire!

My last AGS forum post for a while, in response to the whiny little bitches who try and run the place trying to bring me down with accusations that I am, as far as I can understand their accusation, a plagiarist.

Can I just say two things. 1. I'm not. and 2. - no one but no one would ever accuse them of plagiarism. There isn't anything out there that crap for them to copy.

Ooh look a peanut.

Just FYI- it's all my own work.

You really shouldn't judge others by your own dismal dismal standards.

And this isn't a critique thread, remember? Like I would ever in my right mind ask for critique from this bunch of gasbagging never weres...

And finally, and perhaps most importantly- I couldn't give two shits what any of you no hopers think; I post here for the rest of the people, not the self-love crowd. You don't need anyone else in your universe anyway, do you? It's all full up to the top with awesome already.

And "Cailin" whoever- you don't need to put "royalty free" in quotes like that mate. Your fwends alweady know you're veewwwyyy clebber and sarcastic n stuff.

Seriously, the lot of you can just fuck off for all I (and many, many MANY others) care.
If you genuinely think a majority of people, even here, like you, endorse your arrogant hamfisted crap, or that in the free market a shredded piece of toss would get 10/10 ratings- cut the dosage man. Before it's too late.

There's a reason fuckall people post here. And it ain't me keeping them away.

But hey. What do I know. You're the gods of low res shite after all.

You may notice that I refrain from commenting negatively on anyone else's game, far from it in fact. But hey, again, that's just my bad attitude showing I guess- being positive and encouraging is soooo passe around here. Unless you're one of five or so emotional cripples, whose every rambling inaccuracy, hateful prate at someone seeking advice or horribly HORRIBLY amateurish efforts get praised to high heaven...

I have a theory about AGS, which started off a while ago as a joke between some folks here who can't be bothered posting. But I really think it was a true word said in jest. The crux of it was this: the nitwits who take five years NOT to finish a game are not eve remotely interested in achieving anything. Why would their "hobby" be any different from the rest of their dreadful, empty, lives.

I've had an absolute gutful of the bullshit from the likes of both of you. So mind your damned business, and I will mind mine. Otherwise, it's on. And for the record, the real record in the real world- you're freaking dreaming if you think you're going to win a pissing contest with me outside this forum. But you already know that.

And McCarthy author man- dude, go to art school. Your shit gives people's eyes cancer. Just because eight fuckwits here praise it- check reality before ordering seconds. These clowns are FAILURES. They praise second rate crap because it's NON THREATENING TO THEM.

Look at the work by really talented people, and no, I don't mean my own work. I mean eg Divon's Phoenix. The guys who made El Ammo. Shit, even Harg.

Why do we see such a disparity between the All-Losers Squad opinions here and the opinions of the majority of general consumers? Is it the peerless intellects on display here? Sure. That must be it.

I will quote from another forum user's conversation with me- "I don't really want to participate in the forum discussions, I just read them and laugh at them" meaning... LAUGHS AT YOU FOOLS. As do we all. As do we all.

As someone with no style, in any sense, "Cailin" or whatever your name actually is, you should be the last person to criticise someone else, let alone someone capable of not only original work but pastiche. Unlike your brigade of true nitwits who seem proud of their incapabilities, it may interest you to know (but I doubt it) that the ever-growing majority of forum-abstaining AGS users include professionally qualified people of all stripes, including those of us with multiple degrees, some of them even in applicable disciplines. Sadly, bumming around a college or filling in dole forms still don't count as qualifications.

Cailin old son- You're basically talentless in my opinion. Your saving grace here is that you are surrounded by people so ludicriously inept that they actually look up to you... As far as their public comments indicate.

I can do no better than quote still another wisely abstemious forum non-visitor:

Hilariously stupid wankers the lot of you.

My golden stand out moment here in the last month was reading the first two pages of beginners questions, and seeing 100% of them answered incorrectly by the first responders, who, when not spluttering out sentence fragments in a language they are clearly only passingly familiar with, basically didn't even bother to read the question in the first place. Brilliant, actually. Something the likes of the rest of us would never have thought of- not bothering to read the question of a confused beginner- and so confusing them all the more.

Christ this place needs an enema.

The moral is: never bite your tongue around subhumans. Just whip them as they should be whipped and move on.