Monday, February 8, 2010

The difference between me and most people? I will TOTALLY uppercut the same fucker FOREVER. Even when they're already dead.

Sep 17, 2008 > Age Of Sentry > #1 (OF 6)

Age Of Sentry #1 (OF 6)

Review by Jimski:

Age Of Sentry #1 (OF 6)
Price: $2.99
There was no warehouse fire, you understand. The Library of Congress is still standing.

If you want a Silver Age or Golden Age book with straightforward, corny storytelling and crayon box coloring populated by aw-shucks simpletons, you can get your hands on actual Silver Age or Golden Age books. It's not even hard. They reprint them all the time. There is no need, none whatsoever, to foist this cutesy-poo kitschy wink-wink garbage on the marketplace. This "Grindhouse" school of thought, where we spend $70 million to make a movie look and sound like a crappy older movie that's been kept in the garage since 1971-- a movie which you haven't seen and could easily just go watch-- is a goddamned blight on the culture.

You've read everything Ditko ever worked on? You've finished every issue of the Flash from 1957?

Well, go read 'em again. Trees are getting cut down for this detritus.

On goes the never-ending campaign to manufacture relevance for the least essential character created in the last 10 years! Jam jam jam goes history's shoehorn, violently wedging this featureless glob of chewed up Wonder Bread into a past where he never was and doesn't belong! Again we bask in manufactured nostalgia for a time we did not even experience in the first place! Tune in next issue, when it is revealed that the Sentry is the one who irradiated the spider!

How long? How long must we sing this song?

Giving someone money for this product helps, in its own small way, to make the world a worse place to live in.
Story: 1 - Poor Art: 1 - Poor

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